As I have written about before, we, as a society, create and shape the world we live in. People have defined norms and roles and rules that govern how we interact socially and how we see ourselves in the world. Some of these regulations have been in place for hundreds of generations, some are being newly enforced. Some of these regulations keep people powerless, others keep people in power.
Oppression.
Oppression has become a word that is used in a wide variety of contexts. People are talking more about oppression now, as it has become slightly more normalized to question the systems that guide our society and keep rich, white, straight, men in power. Although this has allowed people to begin to understand the differences in opportunity and personal struggle that individuals face, it has also welcomed criticism and misuse of the phrase.
To simplify this example, I will speak specifically about gender and oppression in relation to gender. I think it would be hard for anyone to argue that women are not oppressed. People generally understand that women have been limited from filling certain roles of power in society, that they are more often victims of abuse than men, that their voices have been silenced for decades, and so on and so forth.
However, people have recently been asking, “Aren’t men oppressed too?” It is as if they feel left out. Yes, they face personal challenges and have been taught to try to fit within the box that society has created for what it means to be a man; whether that means not crying, having to like sports, or not being accepted for being a dancer. The difference is that the box for a man is much larger than the box for a woman. The difference is that that box has always been bigger. And the difference is that when a man follows those societal “rules,” they benefit. They benefit in power and privilege.
A woman does not benefit from being quiet, small, or submissive.
Marilyn Frye, in the piece Oppression and the use of definition writes about this idea using the image of a cage. Women are surrounded by thousands of wires that together keep us from escaping. Men are surrounded by a few wires. Once they look past those wires, there is enough space that they can fly away and are not trapped or kept powerless.
This is true for non-binary individuals as well. Instead of having a narrow box like women do, society treats them as if they have no box. That they do not exist or have the right to identify as they do. This keeps them from accessing power, and keeps them oppressed and “hidden.” Their cage keeps them trapped too.
These cages hurt everyone. Except the wires on the cage for men are spaced out enough that they are able to fly. These cages were created by society. They are not permanent. Everyday, feminists are working to remove the wires that keep people entrapped. Slowly, we are widening the gaps. Maybe one day everyone will fly free.